Archive for the ‘Confessions of a Writer’ Category


I recently marked my third year anniversary of blogging.

Originally I began blogging to build a platform as recommended by agents and publishers in order to help facilitate an audience for the book I had been writing. And yes, I published the book, finished another and have more in progress. But the best part of blogging has been the people I’ve “met.”

Relationships make life worth living.

From the deeply intimate ones I enjoy with Jesus, my husband and children to the casual liked-your-post types, they all add so much to my life. Every week I’m challenged, encouraged, or uplifted by laughter not only because of my dear family and friends, but also through you, my readers and fellow writers.

I thought I’d take a jaunt down my blogging memory lane and provide some of my newer friends with the links of my fondest posts and those readers found helpful.

Mostly, I pray that whatever I write will point people to Jesus.

 Here’s the Top Ten:

 Did You REALLY Meet Online? About Us

A Shout Out

Is Online Dating Gaining Popularity?

The Emptiness of Sexual Encounters

What I’m Learning From My Illness

Miracles Do Happen

What is Intimacy?

Getting Well Series – How Do You Rebuild Your Life?

Online Dating…An Obsession?

IT’S FINALLY HERE!

Hope you enjoy!

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I finished my first novel yesterday.IMG_0368

I confess I cried. Yes, near the end it brought tears both for the characters and me. Finishing a project is like wondering what to do on the day after Christmas. Content, but sad. Joyful, but empty. The idea for this story began thirty plus years ago. Yet it ended far differently than I envisioned. (Those willful characters again.) Now that’s it’s done, I’m amazed at the way it turned out. And glad. But sorry.

I have plenty of other work to do.

But today I found myself wandering. Mentally, emotionally and even in daily life. I actually made dinner early for a change because I didn’t have to drag myself away from writing. I hardly knew what to do with myself. Like an empty-nester whose chicks have all flown off, I’m ready for the next adventure, but not quite over letting the last one go.

Even my blogging is uninspired.

And that’s that. The end.

 

How do you feel when you complete a writing project?

 

 

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I confess I don’t have time to write a blog post today.

The truth is I am in the final pages of my first novel and all the good stuff is happening. Since I never know what my characters may do, especially in the heat of crisis, I’m afraid to leave them alone too long. I already took too long over dinner. (My son needed really needed me.)

So now, I beg your leave with apologies. I will come back next week and attempt to offer something helpful, challenging (thinking of last week…) or encouraging. May God bless you.

Until then, I hear my protagonist calling. She’s in a real dilemma and doesn’t know what to do…DSC_0002

 

Oh, and FYI my first book, The Miracle of Us: Confessions of an Online Dater, is on sale on Amazon in paperback or kindle, or you can order a slightly imperfect copy for a great deal (thanks to a printing error) on my website.

 
What do you do when your characters start doing things you didn’t plan?

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How many of us really know who we are?

Most of us have been shaped by words spoken to us in anger or impatience or from another person’s broken perspective. Who of us didn’t have some kid or kids at school tell us we were stupid, lame, ugly, fat or unwanted for some reason. I know I did. Repeatedly. Statistics show that most children have also suffered from the criticisms, insults and abusive words flung at by overwhelmed, scared or generally messed up parents (aren’t we all?). Many of us have felt the abandonment or rejection divorce brings. Four out of five have been exposed to some type of sexual abuse.

Is is any wonder we struggle to understand who we are?

God created us with a specific design and plan for our life. (Yes, even you.) He delights in the unique personality that makes us, well – us. He knows every nuance, every tilt of our head, all the abilities we possess and what makes us smile. And he loves it when we exhibit those traits. No wonder Satan, the enemy of God and us, whispers lies, uses the wounds others have pressed on us, and creates circumstances to distort the beautiful creation of God that we each are.

But how do we find out who we are and become ourselves again?becomingmyselfbookcover

In her most recent book, Becoming Myself: Embracing God’s Dream of You, Stasi Eldredge shows us how. Becoming Myself takes us straight to the throne of Jesus where we are loved, delighted in and encouraged. As we read, we are transformed by the renewing of our thoughts about ourselves, our God, our relationships and our world. With intimately honest stories that come from the depths of her heart, Stasi reveals how we can see ours more  clearly. While her primary audience is women, every person needs what God shares through Stasi in this book. It tops my “must read” list of books. It’s not only enjoyable and entertaining, it is a life-changing read.

 

In what ways have you lost yourself? How have you learned who you were truly meant to be?

 

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Yesterday, I opened an email from a follower of this blog and a reader of my new book, The Miracle of Us: Confessions of an Online Dater. My tears of joy could not be contained as I read how this person’s life was being challenged and changed by God.  In part, as a result of the book.

DSC_0248

Bella at Riding Lessons

I’ve seen the growth. I feel proud, like a beaming mother watching her child on stage or at a sporting event. (I know this feeling well with seven children and seven grandchildren!) The joy that bursts forth in your heart to see someone live out who they were made to be can’t be described. And the blessing of being a small part of that overwhelms me.

I told my husband, “This is why I write.”

 

It’s not for money. Forget the hype of “New York Times Bestseller! ” Most authors make very little in comparison to the hours they put in.

Nor is it for fame. True, it’s been kind of cool to have a few people recognize me from one of two newspaper articles about the release of my book. But that is nothing but a bit of lovely fun.

To make a point? Well, I suppose that the point I try to make in all my books is that God offers us hope, healing and redemption. His love for us is beyond our comprehension, and he is able and willing to do anything to show us that.

But the bottom line reason is this:

“Thank you again for this book. I’m learning to believe in miracles and the One who works them.”

“I just finished reading your book “The Miracle of Us.”  I loved it! I was in tears at times as I read the miracles that God did in your relationship with Brendan.”

“Laura’s book strengthened my faith in God’s ability to work miracles for broken people.”

“What a lovely story of love, adventure, and God’s faithfulness!”

 

God uses our words, gives them to us in fact, to change lives for people’s good and his glory.

 

I’m so stoked on that. Amazed. Humbled. Grateful.

And I’m convinced he wants to use each of us to do the same. Maybe through books, or poems, or songs, or art or your job as a postal clerk (Tina has blessed me every time I mail something, and she doesn’t even realize she’s doing it), a doctor, a mother, a sales representative…in other words, whatever you do.

So, why do you write?

 

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41RBRdyNsuL._SY344_PJlook-inside-v2,TopRight,1,0_SH20_BO1,204,203,200_Closeness. Familiarity. Seeing into the depth of someone. Allowing ourselves to be seen.

Vulnerability.

Who are you intimate with?  A significant other? Your best friend? How intimate are you? Do you willingly share your heart, your secrets, your hopes and dreams? How are you at recognizing the intonations of their voice or mannerisms? Like me, do you find yourself saying “You sure know me, don’t you?”

Now think about God. Jesus. The Holy Spirit.

If you believe in God, how close are you? Or perhaps you’ve only thought of him as a distant deity.  Maybe you’ve never thought much about God other than to use the word as an explicative. So if I told you that he is intimately acquainted with you, what would you think?

My blogging friend, Rivera Douthit, answers all these questions and more in her new book entitled Intimacy : into me You see. Her presentation of the God who knows and loves us reveals a depth of intimacy that may come as a surprise. I loved the way she examined various areas of life and the corresponding ways God makes himself known to us. Rivera’s use of scripture and fabulous storytelling draws the reader in and offers a glimpse into the heart of God.

He’s not going to deny us the ability to recognize Him if we’re sincerely seeking. He knows our hearts and will reveal Himself in ways best suited  for us and our personalities.

That’s good news for folks who wonder how to find God.

Rivera’s book assures us of God’s love and desire for us. It also points us to ways for us to grow in intimacy in our other relationships as well. In addition, she offers thought provoking questions at the end of every chapter which guide us into considering how intimacy with God and others in our lives currently looks, and how it can become more.

I thoroughly enjoyed Rivera’s stories, and her heart for the Lord. Through Intimacy she offers us a peek into both. A very worthwhile read.

Order Here

 

 

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My daughter is studying the Civil War for history.Kookaburras at Australia Zoo

As I’ve prepared her lessons, read books, directed her projects and watched Gone with the Wind and Shenandoah, I’ve been struck by the analogy to the current trend in publishing. Not to make light of the tragedy of our American Civil War, nor to imply that the publishing world holds the same weight as the potential division of a nation and the issue of slavery. Nonetheless, I find some similarities between the two.

Traditionalists fight for a publishing norm and standard. Publishing has been handled a particular way for centuries. Authors submit their labored words in hope they will capture the attention of those in charge of determining who is worthy of publication. If so deemed, contracts are made in which, ideally, both the publisher and the author will be satisfied with, well, let’s be honest, sales. As we’ve been reminded, even in Christian circles, publishing is a business, after all.

Indies (self-publishers) desire freedom on various levels. Freedom to write and publish whatever moves them. Freedom to retain more of the income from their hard work. The ability to write and publish when they wish rather than waiting for the long process of submitting, waiting for acceptance (am I good enough?) and finally the time allotment for release date and length of time on the shelves. They may not be convinced the publishers actually have their best interests in mind.

Compelling arguments exist on both sides.

My traditionally published author friend, Sherry Kyle, (Delivered with Love, The Heart Stone, The Christian Girl’s Guide to Style and The Girl’s Guide to Your Dream Room) made some valid points in a conversation yesterday.

  1. Publishers have access to retail connections. Her upcoming book (Watercolor Dreams October 2014) is already listed on Amazon for pre-order and in catalogues.
  2. An agent deals with all the financial aspects and details of finding avenues for publishing. I thought about the difference between having a real estate agent and selling your home yourself—having been an agent once, I would never sell my house without one. The business, legal and financial dealings are too complicated without the trained knowledge an agent provides.
  3. While traditional publishers are paying less and expecting more from their authors in the realm of marketing, they at least have marketing plans and connections already set in place.
  4. In addition, a publisher edits (invaluable) and creates a cover design. Two crucial aspects.

Self-publishing offers advantages as well. Since I’ve recently released my first book (The Miracle of Us: Confessions on an Online Dater) which I self-published through CreateSpace, I’ve learned a little about that option. These are the benefits I see:

  1. Self-publishers earn more in royalties.  Thirty to fifty percent versus five to twenty percent. And we know exactly how many copies have sold every day. No guessing or waiting for statements.
  2. An author can publish as many books as fast as he/she can write, edit and format them. No limit, no waiting. That builds a momentum of keeping readers reading. How many times have you finished a book by an author you loved only to find you had to wait a year until the next book was available? I know enough authors to know this isn’t always because they aren’t writing books fast enough. I can think of two series I quit reading because I lost interest waiting and went on to find another book to read.
  3. Readers set the standard of what they will read rather than a publisher choosing what they think will sell.
  4. Self-published authors are not limited to a brand created for them by a publisher. A couple of articles convinced me of this situation. Both told of well-known authors who sold numerous traditionally published books in particular genres. When they wrote outside that genre, publishers, even though they loved their work, refused to publish their new projects because it didn’t fit their brand.  Publishers and agents will say “choose one type of writing and stick with it.” That may make sense from a business perspective, but what if an author feels like writing something else? What if I feel God leading me to delve into fiction, but I’ve been branded as a non-fiction author? Self-publishing allows for variety.

I haven’t decided what I’d like to do with my next, nearly completely book. I always thought I’d submit to an agent and go the traditional route. I’ve spent a few years honing my craft and building a network for that very reason. But, I’m also tempted by these new benefits. I’ve heard great persuasions from both sides. Some authors do both successfully.

In the Civil War, the Union won, keeping the nation together and abolishing slavery.

Although, that victory didn’t necessarily change the hearts of all people. I’d like to think that in the battle of the book, both sides will bring good to the table. In the end, millions of readers have a smorgasbord of brilliant (and sometimes not so brilliant) writing to choose from whether from traditionally published or self-published authors.

What do you think? Traditionalist or Indie? Or…both?

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